This is one of the best gifts I have ever received. Robb (my partner/friend/love/soon to be husband) painted it for me. (It’s so much better in person - He is an amazing painter, and this is one of his best! I feel honored that he gifted it to me. For more of his work - see @robblejuwaan on instagram.
Glittering, sparkling, overwhelming magic. Not everyone believes in it; not everyone recognizes that serendipitous moment when forces collide and magic is the only answer to the “what the?” question. We all amble along in this life, getting things done, making things happen, pulling levers, pushing buttons…..we DO things. We have “to do” lists a mile long. We learn ways to prioritize our “to do” lists so that we can get it all done. Take an average day - we drink coffee, brush our teeth, walk the dog, cook for our kids, tell them to put their dishes in the dishwasher, drive to work, make some decisions, have some meetings, set some appointments, drive home, make some dinner, help with homework, watch some sports or Netflix,pay some bills, have some conversations and a little quality family time, and then do it all again. I love a good “to do” list. I love setting goals, writing down what I want to accomplish, and then proudly checking each item off with a red marker and an internal “YESSSSSS!” I’ve been known to write things down on the list that I’ve actually already done just to be able to check it off. (admit it - you have too!) There can be a lot of joy found in all of that doing throughout the day, but is that all there is - “to do” lists and getting things done?
What about all the really really GOOD STUFF in between? What about that phone call we get from an old friend where we giggle and reminisce and feel insanely grateful that they called? What about that new song that Spotify added to your playlist that has all the words you needed to hear? What about briefly lying your head on your desk wishing you had a new job and at that moment a recruiter calls? What about the one book you pick up in a bookstore that answers a question you have been wondering about? What about that creative burst of energy that appears and we paint a picture or write a story or take beautiful photographs? What about that random class that appears in our instagram feed that we spontaneously sign up for and it is LIFE CHANGING? What about the new friend we make while ON the walk with the dog that just HAPPENED to be strolling along a particular street at exactly the same moment we are strolling along a particular street? What about meeting the love of your life on an airplane and they had JUST changed their seat at the last minute to wind up next to you and you had JUST barely made the flight in time? This is what I mean by magic. When the universe lines up to give you just what you need right when you need it. These things happen all the time. Can we harness some type of energy to MAKE them happen, and if these thing do happen, DO WE EVEN NOTICE?
When I was a little girl, I wanted to write a book. I was in the third grade and it was all I could think about. I had read every single Roald Dahl book ever written, and I was fascinated and entranced at what he could create and how he could make magic real. ( I feel the same way today about Stephen King, one of the most prolific and best writers of all times; his stuff can be gory and over the top, but he sucks you into his magic with words so specifically and beautifully chosen that you can’t stop and suddenly you are in a different reality). My teacher at the time was quite encouraging and told me to write a letter to Roald Dahl, which I did, and he wrote me back! (or his assistant did - whatever!). He signed the letter. He sent me a signed a copy of Charlie and the Great Glass Elevator. He sent both to me, and I was overjoyed. I started my quest to write a book then and there. Every day at recess while the other kids learned about sports and chased each other around the playground, I would go into the long coat closet and sit on the floor and write. and write. and write. I couldn’t tell you what about, I couldn’t tell you what happened to that book, but I was determined. And since then I have continued to write, mostly privately, but have ventured into a blog in recent years. I’ve toyed with the idea of multiple book topics, but this one keeps coming back to me as a message I want to get out there. I think it’s ironic (magical?) that it started with the magic of Roald Dahl and is culminating in my own little magical game of Bingo. One of my favorite Roald Dahl quotes is - Those who don’t believe in magic will never find it. So, open your mind to magical thinking, suspend your disbelief if you will, and let in the possibility of a little magic. Combined with a little gratitude. The two together will change your life.
I read a book a few years ago that was about playing games in your life - I can’t for the life of me remember what the book was called or I would name it here. I remember that I didn’t much like the book except for one little part of it…..it was a section about playing BINGO with your life. I read a lot of books, gather a lot of ideas, maybe even try a thing or two for awhile, but this is something that has stuck and has literally CHANGED MY LIFE. I’m going to teach you how to do it, I’m going to challenge you to try it, and we’re going to make magic happen in your life.
The game itself is a 5-15 minute commitment once a week. You know - 1/10 of the time you spend scrolling on social media - you have the time, you just have to commit to it. I say 5-15 minutes because the first few times you do it it takes a little more time, but the more you do it, the easier it gets. I spend about 5 minutes now, and it impacts the other 10075 minutes of my week in a big way.
So let’s get started. You need a bingo template - 5 squares by 5 squares - typical Bingo. You can had draw it, or you can go to a website from your phone or computer and find a free one. Some people like to write, some like to type - your choice. I do the latter and I just typed in 5x5 bingo card template and there are a few. I have always used the one that says 5x5 Bingo Card Maker - Teach-nology. It gives you 25 blank spots that you fill in and then it creates your card. I then save it to iBooks on my my phone and have a digital card saved for every week. I have been doing this every Monday (mostly without fail) for more than five years now. It may not be a randomized, double blinded, placebo controlled study, but I’m here to tell you it works.
The first rule of the BINGO game is you sit back and think about random good things that could POTENTIALLY happen in a week. Sometimes I look at my calendar to see what’s upcoming, sometimes I’m less specific. The key is this is the antithesis of a “to do” list. This is a “could happen” list. As in, things out of your control that could happen to you. Now - you may be sorely disappointed if you fill every square with WIN THE LOTTERY. The key here is things that could happen. (I don’t know if you know the lottery odds, but even in my most magical of thinking days, the odds are stacked against you here). That being said, nearly every week one of my squares reads “receive random money”…could be a quarter in the washer, a random refund check in the mail, or a friend repays me for a loan I forgot I made. You get the picture. Some things are very specific, some more vague. I imagine every person out there has different ideas of what a “good thing” looks like. Mine vary from week to week depending on what is upcoming, depending on my mood, and depending if anyone has asked me to add one of their desires to my bingo card that week.
You fill in each box with one good thing. Some examples:
Hear from an old friend
Receive random money
Make a new friend
Have a great conversation with a stranger
Receive a gift
Discover new music
Get sucked into a book
Score the winning touchdown
Give an amazing presentation
Have safe and easy travels
Feel inspired to create something
Quality family time happens
Great conversation with your child happens
Have an amazing strong run
Sometimes they are about feelings, not actual event
Feel inspired
Feel gratitude
Feel deep love
Feel helpful
Feel mentally strong
You get the idea. The key is - something you have no control over or something you would like to happen to you or a way you would like to feel in the upcoming week.
Timing is up to you. I have a reminder set on my phone to do every Monday at 7 am. I’m an early riser and this gives me the opportunity to get my week off to a great start. I also take this time to do the other part of this exercise which is to pull up the previous week’s card and check off the boxes of the things that actually happened. It gives you the opportunity to look at a square and think - YES, I did have a conversation with a stranger - that uber driver and I talked about quantum physics! (or global warming, or the love of your mother, or whatever!). Little things that add up to an interesting and great life. It’s so freaking simple, but do we ever do it?
I will get right to the punch line here - EVERY WEEK FOR FIVE YEARS - at the end of the week 24-25 of the boxes are checked. 24-25 GOOD THINGS happen to me. Even if I’ve had a rough week, it gives me the opportunity to open my heart to the extreme gratitude of all the little and big things that happen every week to make my life full and wonderful. It takes me out of the “to do” list mentality and into the love is in the details magic. Life is magical and wonderful and sometimes awful and tragic. I believe that focusing on the good things brings more of these things into your life. This is a way to harness that belief. A lot of people think that kind of thinking is hocus pocus or just silly. I have lived it for five years straight now. That’s not to say the past five years haven’t had rough moments, bad news, heartbreak, or tragedy. All of those things happen. And, at the same time, so many magical, wonderful, delightful small miracles happen every single day. (the other day ALL 25 of my things happened in a SINGLE day) LOOK for the magic. Be GRATEFUL for the magic. That is the message of BINGO.